Let’s be honest. Many guys are afraid of approaching a woman because they don’t know what to say. Think of how less fearful you would be of approaching a woman if you knew how to talk to a woman.
In this blog post that is exactly what we’re going to break down. We are giving you the 14 rules to success on how to talk to a woman.
1) LEARN HOW TO TALK TO WOMEN BY TALKING TO WOMEN
That’s right! The first rule to learning how to talk to women is by talking to women. You have to put yourself out there and talk to women. Don’t be afraid of rejection because you’re going to get rejected. Every guy gets rejected.
The sooner you get familiar with rejection the better off you’re going to be when it comes to how to talk to women.
If you continue in your fear of rejection then you’re never going to talk to women. And if you never talk to women, you’re never going to know how to talk to women.
2) THE BASICS TO TALKING TO WOMEN
If you’re going to learn how to talk to women there are some basic things that you must know. These basic things will enhance your chances at a successful conversation with a woman.
- Make sure you’re dressed for the occasion. For example, if you’re at the beach it’s okay to approach a woman in swim shorts. However, you wouldn’t do so at a dinner. It’s a little extreme of an example but it’s simply saying that you need to be dressed for the occasion.
- Your breath needs to be on point. Don’t approach a woman with questionable breath. Have some gum or mints on you and chew one. Bad breath is an absolutely sure way to stack the odds against you.
- Have something planned out that you’re going to say (more on this on number 3). Otherwise you might get there and just not know what to say or say something inappropriate.
- Read the room. That is, give yourself the best chance by calculating if it’s a good time to approach her based on who’s around. Is her family around? Does she have an engagement ring or wedding ring on? Observe these things before making your move, or not.
3) KNOW WHAT YOU’RE GOING TO SAY
Yes, you need to have something that you are going to say to a woman when you approach her. Otherwise, things are not going to go well. You’re going to look like a weirdo and she’s going to feel awkward, to say the least.
Have something pre planned on what you are going to say to that woman when you approach her.
We completely, for the most part, discourage the use of pick up lines. For the most part, they’re corny. And, they don’t say anything about your originality and creativity to a woman. A woman can sense a pick up line versus something real and genuine geared towards her.
So, what do you say instead of a pick up line? The answer is, something natural and organic to the setting that you’re in. For example, if you’re at a wedding, make it something relevant to the wedding. You may even start off with a compliment on her hair, dress, etc. This will work in almost any environment.
There’s always something that you can say to a woman that will break the ice. You just have to analyze the environment and her to come up with exactly what to say.
4) KEEP THE CONVERSATION WITH HER GOING
That’s easier said than done, right? Right. But there are ways to keep the conversation going that are simple. Here’s what you do.
To keep a conversation going with a woman the primary secret is to talk about her. The best way to get her to talk about herself is by asking her questions.
What you need to do as a man to keep the conversation going with a woman is to simply ask her questions.
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5) DON’T ASK BORING QUESTIONS
Don’t be boring to her by asking her boring and mundane questions. For example, what’s your favorite color, etc. Ask her questions that will get her excited about talking to you. For example, have you ever thought about what it would be like to go skydiving and running a marathon in the same day?
Stay away from boring questions! It’s a sure way to get her uninterested in your conversation, quickly!
6) DON’T BE AN INVESTIGATIVE JOURNALIST
As stated in rule number 5 on how to talk to a woman, don’t be boring. Another crucial rule is, don’t be an investigative journalist. That is, don’t ask her personal and intrusive questions. For example, where do you work? What’s your relationship with your parents like, etc.
What you want to do when talking to a woman and asking her questions is make her feel at ease. You don’t make a woman feel at ease when you’re asking her personal questions. The best way to make a woman feel at ease is to follow rule number 7.
7) MAKE HER LAUGH
The secret to making a woman feel comfortable in a conversation is to make her laugh. Getting a woman to laugh should be one of your objectives when speaking to her.
You have to look for the moment(s) when you can slide something funny in the conversation. This will relax her some and open the way for the conversation to continue.
It’s not that you have to get her to give you a full blown belly laugh. No. Even a slight chuckle will be enough. However, getting her to laugh should definitely be an objective in your conversation with a woman.
8) DISCOVER IF SHE WANTS YOU TE KEEP TALKING TO HER
The sooner you figure this out the better off you will be and eliminate time wasting. You need to figure out if the woman wants you to keep talking to her.
The question is, how? The answer is simple. This is the absolute way to know if she wants you to keep talking to her.
Are you ready? Is she responding to your questions and is she asking you questions? If she is responding to your questions, keep going. If she is asking you questions as well, definitely keep going.
9) DON’T TALK FOR TOO LONG, KEEP IT BRIEF
A mistake that some men make when talking to a woman is that they extend the conversation beyond the appropriate length.
When talking to a woman, just as important as knowing what you are going to say, is to know when you’re going to walk away. That is, when you’re going to end the conversation.
Don’t extend the conversation beyond the necessary time period. You have to know when to wrap up the conversation. The best time to wrap up a conversation when you’re learning how to talk to a woman or at any point, is on a high note.
That is, you end the conversation at its highest peak. You don’t want the conversation to be on a downward spiral when you close it out. No. You close out the conversation at its highest point and on your terms.
This will keep her interested and wondering. However, before closing out the conversation, follow rule number 10.
10) GET HER CONTACT INFORMATION
Before you close out the conversation, don’t make the mistake of not getting her contact information. You only need one.
Don’t ask for all of her social media accounts and phone number as well. Simply ask for the most popular one or the one that she uses most.
As for asking for her phone number, that can be a little too intimate for her based on the fact that you both just met. However, this does not mean that you don’t ask for it. You just have to have a feel, based on how the conversion went, if she’s going to be willing to give you her phone number.
With that said, if you ask her for her phone number and she doesn’t give it to you, ask for her preferred social media contact. And if she does give you her phone number, there’s no need to ask her for her social media contact, at that moment.
You can always text her later with your social media handle.
PS: It’s recommended that if she gives you her number that you either give her yours right away or text her later. In the text be sure to include your full name. You want her to be able to google you and search your social media accounts to put her at ease about who you are.
FURTHER READING: How To Go For The First Kiss
11) IF SHE DOESN’T WANT TO TO TALK, THAT’S OKAY
Never forget rule number 10 as you develop your skills of how to talk to a woman. If she doesn’t want to talk, that’s okay.
That’s totally okay if you approach a woman and she doesn’t want to talk to you. Don’t take it personal. That’s her God given right not to want to talk to you.
Simply walk away. There’s plenty of other women out there. And keep in mind, talking to women is a numbers game. Some may want to talk to you, but most may not. It’s just how it is.
However, the better you become at “reading the room” the less women will turn you down. It’s a skill that you develop the more you talk to women and the more you get rejected by women.
12) YOU DON’T HAVE TO TALK TO EVERY WOMAN
Sometimes guys want to talk to every woman. That’s not a well thought out plan. Simply because not all women are available and not all women want to talk to you. Keep that in mind as you make your judgment on what woman to approach.
13) BE CONFIDENT IN YOUR APPROACH
When you approach a woman to speak to her you need to do so confidently. Approach her with confidence in yourself and confident in what you are saying to her.
That’s not to say that you’re not going to be shaky or nervous, but don’t let that cause you to lose your confidence. In your nervousness, stay confident and keep the conversation going.
You’ll notice that as the conversation unfolds the nervousness will go away.
14) THESE RULES ARE NOT WRITTEN IN STONE
These 12 rules on how to talk to a woman are not written in stone. There are going to be times when it’s completely appropriate to break these rules. As a matter of fact, these rules are here to guide you, but you will eventually develop your own principles on how to talk to a woman.
And as always we like to close with a saying, quote or adage and today’s is from Lala Anthony when it come to approaching a woman (video below): ANY SCENARIO WORKS IF YOU HAVE INTEREST IN THE PERSON.
Now, go forth and change the game!